Its a gamble!

So what has been happening in the journey to have baby number 2? Apparently I have an abnormality of my uterus where the baby is supposed to implant. It cannot get blood supply and therefore I have early miscarriages. It is genetic, formed at birth. I did a test called HSG where they basically stick a catheter up your unmentionable area and shoot dye up there and then take a ton of x rays to see where they dye goes. Everything in the ovaries and fallopian tubes were great no scar tissue or blockage preventing eggs from traveling on down. But we new that would not be a problem since I get pregnant.

Now for my uterus which is the main reason we did this test, things were a bit confusing. There was a dip in the top of the uterus which means one of two things. An arcuate uterus (which is a normal variation of normal)or a uterine septum. The doctor doing the test was not my assigned fertility specialist, but she is her co-worker. She explained that a further test would be needed to evaluate the exact size of this problem. If it was above a certain size it would be a uterine septum and would have to be removed to have a successful pregnancy. If it was below that size, it is not normal but a variation of normal that is acceptable and has not issues. However, given that I have had 2 miscarriages early on in pregnancy (at implantation phase), this doctor believed that the uterine abnormality was the cause of my problems and I should have it removed. She said new healthy tissue would grow and I would have a good chance at having other babies. I asked her how I had everett fine and she believed he implanted ina different area which is why I had placenta previa and some other issues with my pregnancy.

So Mixed emotions. Grateful to have an answer, grateful it might be an easy guaranteed fix. I called that minute to schedule the next test and found out that the next available appointment was a month away. This doc said she cannot tell me what to do as not my doc but gave me approval to schedule the test as it is a long wait. So a week later I meet with my acutal fertility doctor who tells me my uterus looks good. SAY WHAT???? She said well there is a little dip but I can tell it is so small it is fine. I told her what the other doc said and she told me I could get the test done but if it was under 5mm she would not remove it. She believed that since I had a successful full term pregnancy with Everett another one is possible without the surgery. She was concerned that removing this area of extra fiberous tissue would lead to scar tissue that would mean a permanent problem to grow a healthy baby. She felt that I should explore the possiblity of a low progesterone which is the most common cause of miscarriages. Unfortunately the problem is you cannot test your progesterone levels until you are pregnant. Of course you don't want to get pregnant, test your level and find it is low. It is too late at that point to start the medicaiton and have it keep the baby. So, she suggested starting progesterone as soon as I find out I am pregnant and then they will monitor the levels as well as serial HCG to see if miscarriage is pending. IF it does not work then I will have the follow up uterine test as well as a whole mess of tests. Once you have 3 miscarriages, you get a whole bunch more tests. HOW FUN!
After some thought I decided that I would take the gamble and try to do the progesterone. I realize this may not work and it will further prolong having baby number 2, but the risk of scar tissue and never being able to have another baby was too scary to go right ahead and try the surgery.

Both doctors agreed that this growth was under the 5 mm mark. It was just that one said it should be removed no matter what due to my cirumstances. I will err on the side of caution. I second guess my self sometimes when I think of how this may just prolong everything if I have another miscarriage, but I have accepted that my family may be small,my children may be 7 years apart. I feel at peace when I think about adopting a child. I know that no matter what happens it will be ok. I just have to let go of that family I had planned out just so and embrace what may come. (NOtice I have not accepted that I will have just one child). I know this is long and not interesting to most, but I want to keep this as a record so that my future child whether biological or not knows how badly I want them, and that I did everything I could to have him or her as a part of my family.