Birthday update and baby update

I posted a birthday post but took it down within a few hours. It was a post written in the moment and as I laid down to sleep I could not help but think I need to erase that. So I got up and deleted it cause I really needed my sleep. Some people have asked me what happened to the post and what was in it. Here is the low down. My birthday was Oct 31st (halloween), it happened to mark the 2 month point since Heather passed. I realized that every birthday would be another month and thought what a crummy birthday I am going to have for a while always having to think about this. It was a crazy busy day at work that day to get everyone discharged and out the door so they could go trick or treating. I was working in an area I don't normally work in and trying to get everything done. I did not get to lunch until about 4:00 pm and I ate my lunch with tears streaming down my face thinking of how this is just the start of the first of everything without Heather. The first thanksgiving, christmas, and my first child. But after I wrote about it and went to bed I thought how lame am I? So I deleted it. Here are some pictures of Tristan and I celebrating my birthday. We went out the evening before to the Melting pot and then to a dollar movie. We had a gift card to the melting pot and a coupon. What a wonderful night. Two hours of chatting and eating yummy yummy food (its all fondue) with my sweet husband. We committed to picking out a baby name for our son, but after 2 hours we still did not have one. (Just went through the name book again, still nothing). In these pictures I am 36 weeks and a day.







BABY UPDATE: I went to the doctor today. IT has been a week since she said any day, but since it is your first it could still take a couple weeks. I understand but how is that anyday? Today I did not let her examine me, I don't want this baby to come for another week due to Tristan having a bunch of tests next wednesday. Anytime after that is fine. I know I have no control, but if I can stay off my feet and rest I think we can make it. When she examined me last week I had major contractions all day. I wanted to keep working this week, just 8 hour shifts, but I did something to my foot and I can hardly bare any weight on my right foot. I have to wear tennis shoes with orthodics to not be in pain. So after much fretting, I decided to not go back to work anymore this week. I turned in my disability stuff today. Hopefully that will all work out. I had 4 days off in a row and I was so bored. I don't know what I am going to do for the next couple of weeks. I still need to start decorating the nursery and pack a bag for the hospital.