Halloween, my birthday and a miscarriage all in one

Well, this year was an interesting halloween/birthday for me. My birthday is on halloween and I turned 31. I already felt like I was getting too old too fast. I always wanted to have a lot of children, but not having my first until I turned 29 makes you really race against the clock to even have a few. We were very surprised to find out I was pregnant in the middle of October but very excited. With Everett there was no enjoying it. It was total chaos in my life at that time. We had just found out the cancer had spread to Heath'er brain the month before, plus we were not trying so we were in shock for the first bit. We knew it would be so over whelming for my family to have a new grand child with everything going on and I feared my mom would kill me. In addition, when we went to my first appointment there was no heartbeat. The doctor said I was either only 4 weeks along or the baby had stopped growing. Mix that in with loosing my job and Heather getting sicker and sicker. My pregnancy with Everett was very over shadowed with so many other things I never really got to enjoy it.

(I am writing this in detail for journaling purposes)

SO we find out about baby number 2 and we just start screaming for joy. We could finally enjoy a normal pregnancy. I new something was different. I was having headaches nightly like I did with Ev,and a girl at work brought in sea food for lunch and I could't stop dry heaving. So I took a test and it confirmed it. Then after 3 days of finding out we were pregnant I started feeling so great. Had so much energy,not exhausted any more no more headaches. Everett was in this phase of not going to sleep until midnight and I was getting up at 5:30 and going to work. I still had so much energy. I told Tristan something is wrong and of course he told me I was over reacting. I was at work exactly a week after we found out and the shift was almost over when I started spotting. I just had this gut feeling to go to the emergency room. They kind of thought I was crazy cuz I was just spotting, but they did an ultrasound to find out there was no baby. I asked the doc if I was totally crazy and if I was never pregnant. He said my HCG levels were at 28 which means I was pregnant. He told me 3 things could be happening. 1)ectopic pregnancy, 2)Miscarriage, or 3)I was just barely pregnant so there was nothing showing on my ultra sound and my levels were just started to go up. I left there not knowing which it was and had an appointment to see an OB in 2 days and have my levels re drawn as that would determine what was happening.

The next morning I am making Everett eggs for breakfast when I knew for sure I was having a miscarriage. I called the doctor, they said there was nothing they could do and to keep my appointment for the next day. I go to the doc the next day and she does another ultra sound, still no baby. She says its not ectopic (that was my worst fear)and I was probably just barely pregnant and implanting. I questioned this as there was so much blood by now. When we left Tristan said you know you are not just barely pregnant just prepare for the call tonight when they get your blood results.

My HCG was only 10 which means it dropped from 28 to 10 in only 2 days. When I went back 2 weeks later it was 0. So I did not need any surgery thankfully.

I was totally fine with the whole thing. I know that most miscarriages are due to the baby not being healthy. I was only 6 weeks along and not ever seen the baby or been to an OB appointment which made it easy to deal with. My only hang up about the whole thing is that I already lost 6 weeks and then have to wait 3 months to try again which makes it about 6 months by the time I will be pregnant again. That is not really a big deal to have my kids 3 years apart instead of 2.5 years. But for somebody who already felt like turning 31 was getting old that really made me feel like I was racing the clock even more. This all happened right before my birthday.
What a way to celebrate turning 31. The pregnancy I was finally going to get to enjoy ended up with its own problems. Perhaps the third time will be the charm. Thankfully I have Everett. I will post pics and how his halloween went in a separate post. He is so cute he deserves a solo Halloween post.